Sometimes when we are angry or pissed about something it’s hard to get into a good mood again. Seeing no opportunities in that moment and focusing on what’s not working, it will become worse and worse. Finally, in the (hopefully) rare moments where we are lost in negativity, it seems almost impossible to get into a good state again. We can do whatever we want or think as positive as possible but it won’t change or get even worse. However, it is possible! Here are the ways to change your state instantly.
Move like a happy person
While reminding yourself of the good moments in your life, it’s easy to put a little smile on our face just by going through the special memories in your mind. But instead of thinking your way into a good mood, there are much better solutions. Thinking yourself happy will only work if you feel at least neutral in that situation. It won’t help much to think about something funny when we feel miserable. We’ve all been there, it’s useless.
So what we have to do is to act! Move and talk like a happy person. You’ll have to force yourself if changing your state immediately is important to you. Just compare for yourself a happy and a depressed person. Who is more likely to talk loudly and who is more likely to talk quietly? So, if you want to move towards the state of a happy person, you’ll have to talk loudly and express yourself. Acting and moving around will make you loosen up the tightness and is the best way to get yourself into a good mood.
I can get it, that there are often environments where we „can’t“ just move around like we want to. It would be bad manners to stand up and shout around in a seminar of your workplace. However, in most situations, there is a way to express yourself freely without disturbing other people. What you need is a lot of courage, that’s it! Man up and do what is necessary to get yourself into the desired state.
Interrupt the habit
We all have certain individual patterns which we repeat in our good and bad times. We can say for 99% of us people, that we breathe more rapidly rather than deeply when we face a bad situation. Become mindful of your breathing when you feel bad. Therefore, if you have actually the luck to identify your shallow breathing, start immediately to breathe deeply.
Shallow breathing is just one of the many patterns we repeat when we are stuck in a bad mood. A stressed person forms a face which looks pulled together. A happy person expands every facial detail possible like opening the eyes widely, raising the eyebrows and putting a big grin on the face.
What you have to do is to realize the details and adjust them instantly. It’s hard to think and think until you finally have a big smile. It needs momentum and a rapid movement, spontaneity and power! That’s what will make your stressed muscles loosen up.
Anchor good times
The good times in our lives play a big role. If we just repeat in bad situations what we do individually in our best moments, there is a high chance to change your state immediately. Find out, what your personal habits are when you feel very good. What jokes do you make? What words do you use? And what kind of movements do you do? Every one of us has his own individual behaviors for feeling very good.
Regarding that, we call those behaviors anchors. You can set anchors mindfully yourself also. Generally, what you have to do is just doing something special. Something that you only do when you feel a certain way. That is to ensure to don’t irritate your mind and feelings.
First become normal
In really tough situations where it seems almost impossible to change your state immediately towards happiness, just accept it. There is no normal way known for jumping from very sad to very happy. And if there would be, it won’t be very healthy actually. Imagine you could just let your state change that easily by extrinsic influences. Our body makes sure to have a stable organism with relatively stable feelings.
So finally what you would have to do with an extremely bad mood is to become normal again. Take care of the basics like your breathing and not thinking yourself into despair or rage and you should be fine. Reassure to yourself that there is no need to be happy instantly. You can split in into two parts and it’s also a natural transition that way. When you are finally feeling neutral again, that’s where you can use the known tactics for feeling happy.